Getting Better!

This week did get better as I hoped it would. We went to our Bishops house to go teach Rock the next lesson but we didn't teach him. The Bishop did! It was great. He taught about the Priesthood. Once again we were able to see how the influence of the spirit works on Rock's kids. We told them that once their dad has the priesthood he can baptism them if they choose to be baptized. One of the sons just gets so excited when we talk about it. He lit up and you could feel the happiness and excitement emanating from him. The only sad part is that other son is refusing to be happy about anything to do with baptism. I am sincerely concerned for him. Rock is getting his first true test after being baptized. His company his having a business trip down to Cabo, Mexico. In this trip there is a lot of drinking and other temptations. Rock has had to mentally prepare for this trip for 3 weeks and has set limits and boundaries of activities he will and will not participate in. We have been on the edge of our seats for 3 days now because we cant talk to him. We just keep praying he will have the spirit with him and make good decisions. If he can get through this trip he can overcome anything! 

Yesterday was an amazing day! We had the special privilege and opportunity to have Elder Dallin H. Oaks and Elder Wong come! It was so fun to watch him arrive early and go around the entire building to meet everyone! Our Stake has over 1300 people in it and a good chunk of those individuals got to meet him. My companion and I happened to be standing next to some other Sisters and when Elder Oaks shook our hands. He took just a couple extra seconds to ask where each one of us is from. It was so fun to see him get interested in the people. It was an amazing conference and there was a lot of laughter. Elder Oaks is funny!!!!!! He had met a lot of our investigators and made a point to speak to them about the Restoration and the Plan of Salvation. He is the only person I have ever heard gracefully bring up our Heavenly Mother. It was quite amazing and had me on the edge of my seat...... I got worried for a little second. hahahaha silly me. Probably one of my most favorite parts of the talk and the most memorable was when he shared a story of cornering his RM grandson and asking him why he wasn't married yet. His grandson's response was, "Well grandpa in the last year I have dated 106 different girls." To which Elder Oaks responded after thinking about it for a short time, "It seems you are putting forth a lot of effort and I commend you. But your standards must be wrong if you have not found a wife in those 106!" He is now married. But the memorable part of this story was when he raised his voice pounded the pulpit and said to every young man of the dating age. "STOP HANGING OUT! YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE DATING!" I will tell you every Elder we saw after the meeting felt chastised in advance. It was so funny! There were many other things said that all missionaries just drooled over. He referenced the Articles of Faith 1 and 3. They are the short statements of pure doctrine of the Restoration and the Plan of Salvation. He also said that the Roman Catholic church is our natural ally. Their beliefs run so closely to ours that they are our best natural ally. The church has done a lot to put our forces together to stand for right throughout the world (i.e. abortions). It was insightful to say the least. 

We tried to ride bikes again this week. Last week my companion crashed. It was hilarious after I figured out she was okay! On this weeks particular day we talked to some very nice people who took the time to have a conversation with us. It must have been the Lords will that we just talk to them and no one else in the Park at the moment because as we went to continue on up the hill, my bike pedal snapped off! Not so funny! I had to walk up the rest of the gigantic hill! =) Luckily I could coast down the hill back to the apartment. So now I need to go get some new pedals. 

It has been super hot this week. We have already broke 100 degrees. It just tells you what this summer is going to be like. Not cool weather! Everyone is worried about fires and how hot it is going to get. Its not normal at all that we are heating up this fast. 

Well I think that is just about it for this week. 

I love you all and hope you have a wonderful week!

Hurrah for Israel!

Love,

Sister Cottrell

Webs of Entanglement

I am going to apologize in advance. I am not sure how positive this email will be. My heart is heavy and my attitude is somber. This week has been so hard. With all that happened last weekend with our Bully it has really put a damper on a ton of other things. We had a lesson with Rock to start his new member lessons this week. Everyone failed to tell us that his ex-wife was coming and we were NOT prepared to teach a lesson for her. They wanted to move the lesson time up and gave us 45 minute notice. Then when we got there we still didn't start until the original time because they kept talking and wouldn't sit down so we could start!!!!!! Oh and the ex-wife didn't show up till then! Not only that but because of our Bully and his attitude towards us and the way we felt in his home we couldn't teach with the spirit to save our lives. It didn't go well and Rock's ex-wife was no more convinced what we believe is a good thing for her kids than when she arrived. Its a nasty situation and totally stressful. Our ward mission leader met with us to talk about what to do with the situation. He felt it important to talk to the Bishop about it and we told him we weren't comfortable with it because it might cause another flare up if the Bully got word of it. Wellyesterday (luckily) our Bully was out of town. The Bishop asked us to come and meet with him after church. We were slightly apprehensive. The whole time he talked and then when he wanted us to "vent" we didn't. When we tried to talk and inform him of the details we felt were important for him to know he justified every single thing said and done to us with "Well he has a big heart and is like a bull in a china cabinet and you are dainty flowers so you got stepped on." What we didn't know before that meeting was that our Bishop and our Bully are super close friends. So of course what we have to say about how we feel and what happened is totally unbelievable to him. All he kept saying was that he was going to talk to the Bully and when we said we weren't okay with that because of  fear of having a repercussion it was totally dismissed. It appears that no matter what we say to the men in this ward it doesn't matter they dont listen!  I AM SO FRUSTRATED! I can't do anything here! I am totally and completely stuck in Castaic. Like a fly stuck to a spiders web! I have tried so hard to love the ward and the area and I just can't seem to accomplish it. We aren't sleeping, we can barely work, I have had a migraine from stress the last 4 days and I want to leave. I have no idea what I am supposed to learn. I dont understand why it has to come this way. I get yelled at everyday, I get doors slammed in my face but I know its not personal. I can deal with it, but this is personal and I can't handle it. That is it. 

On the lighter side of things.....my companion and I went on a little road trip with some other missionaries to the Arcadia mission for a doctors appointment. It was so fun to see more of California and to have the time to get to know other missionaries on a level that was personal for all of us. It was a grand ol' time and the break we needed from Castaic. It felt so good to not have to focus on our area while we were gone. Doesn't that sound horrible?! But its the truth. Now my companion is doing much better with what the appointment was for. I am glad it got worked out just in time for things to keep blowing up. 

Our investigators this week asked about baptism and the things they need to stop doing so it can happen. It was a step in the right direction and we were so excited. Also they were able to read Alma 32 and got so much out of it! Baby steps are necessary for these particular people and its beginning to show. That is about the only highlight this week I can think of. 

So I apologize again for this email. Like I said its been hard to stay positive this week. I have no idea what this week holds in store but I hope its better.

Hurrah for Israel!

Love,

Sister Cottrell

Difficult Week!

So I sent another message with pictures hopefully it came. The pictures are of Rock and Brother Tujague (his friend from coaching days. Victory should know who he is! =D BYU Cougars), Rock and his kids and then Sister Hatfield and I spending some time at the Lake on our Easter Lunch picnic. 

This week was such an emotional roller coaster. I will try to spare you the gory details but in short the sister missionaries in the Castaic ward have identified a bully. Without going into what all happened it put me in a very hard situation and President Hall and I have talked for about 2 hours 30 minutes in person and over the phone. Yesterday was the worst of it all. Our Bully sought us out took us outside and proceeded to yell at us and belittle us. It didn't matter what we did or said it was going to be his way. I felt so small, so unappreciated. The focus of Rock getting baptized was entirely lost in this members perspective because all he could focus on was what we had done that he didn't like. I will admit that with all the events it could have been done better but what is done is done and it cant change. After our little show down at church we left. (It was right before the last hour of church) When I had finally calmed down enough to talk we decided to take a picnic to Castaic Lake (the park) to work through more of the emotions of the day. So here is what is now happening; Essentially my companion and I are now slaves to the member (our bully) and for the sake of our recent convert it has to be that way. President Hall has counseled me just to go with what he wants. It stinks because I am not the type of person who goes with the demands of others unless it is for a very very very good reason. The fact that I am literally a slave to the demands of this member is killing me. I have to be at his house when he says we will be there. I teach what he wants us to teach. We get no say and are not allowed to give suggestions. Follow the Spirit?...out the window, mostly. The member is in total and complete control. President Hall was extremely upset when he learned the details of our showdown. He also had to calm down and make sure he didn't do anything that would allow me to see his anger over it all. He was sad that I had to have this experience. It was a good conversation he and I were able to have. We decided the best thing to talk about after all of this came to light is to let it go. He compared our bully to the one year old child that punches you in the nose. You don't throw the child down and step on him because of it. You change the position he is in so he can't punch you. Basically you don't engage. In our confrontation with the Bully I had the rare opportunity to put into practice everything I have learned on my mission of getting out of a heated argument/discussion/situation. I tried so so so hard to not engage. I wasn't perfect at it but I did try. President Hall is very proud of my efforts and that brings me comfort. I was also told that while I am trying to let go of the things that have happened I shouldn't work on forgiving him for 3 years. Why 3 years? I have no idea. Maybe by that time I will realize I have forgiven him and will know that it doesn't matter anymore. I will have let it go. While I have been thinking a lot about letting it go I have thought of Dad's phrase he used with me when I had another bully in elementary school. Set yourself free...Its the same concept and one I believe I will work on my whole life. At the end of the conversation we reviewed things that have happened to me on my mission with bully's. Turns out I have had quite a few of them. President Hall shared with me some of his insight into my mission. He said, "I have just sat here and listened to you talk so calmly about your mission. Not about what was so horrible and bad but the things you have learned." He explained to me that on my mission I have learned a gift of self awareness, the ability to recognize things I need to change. He told me that I have learned to be teachable and that Heavenly Father must really love me because he keeps sending experiences to me so that I can be teachable. I probably wouldn't have learned these things any other way. I am teachable because I love my Savior and want to follow him as best I can. Heavenly Father is hearing my prayers and knows the desire I have to be better. He suggested that Heavenly Father must have something for me to do and so he is helping me now so that I can be prepared to do it later. President Hall then asked me "Why do you think I understand so well what you are going through?" My answer was because he has been through it too. He explained that everything I have been through he has gone through too but much later in life than me. Last night I learned what has changed about me while I have been here on my mission. It was an answer to a prayer. I have been praying to see the changes in myself because I still feel there is so much to change in so little time. He stopped me when I explained that and told me, "but you recognized it!" I recognized that there is still change that needs to take place. And there always will be. Its just a part of life. He also explained that when he finally figured things out he started to love the imperfect him because that was part of The Plan. It was so good and better than the hug I had been longing to have. (Which he ended up giving me...heehee..... shhh....)

That was a really long explanation of a 48 hour period of time but there you have it. Easter dinner was amazing! We went and had some authentic Korean food at a members house! It was so yummy! Still working on perfecting my chopstick skills though. ;) The most important part of this week was Rock's baptism. He is baptized and confirmed and it is wonderful. A word we use in this mission with each other is "Shaka" (shaw-ka) Which literally means "everything is good." So, Shaka. 

I love you all and hope that you had a wonderful Easter! 

Hurrah for Israel!

Love,

Sister Cottrell